Friend me on Facebook

Actually, no, don’t do that. I come from this magical place, where people are not up in each others’ butt, so maybe, just maybe, seeing that someone is friends with some other someone I barely know isn’t an open invitation to „add” them to my social network.

As I child/teen, I used to say that I don’t have a phone, just to skip that moment when people would call me. When I finally got a mobile phone (remember when they used to call them that?), I got the plan which allowed me to pay little to nothing on texts and it also gave the possibility to call people, if I ever needed to do such a wild thing.

I’m not big on socializing, and this has turned me into this weird, awkward being. Or maybe I was already broken and unsociable and the internet has done nothing to fight off this disease.

I don’t know what’s the cause or maybe if there’s a cure, but I live in constant fear of someone asking me to friend them on Facebook. I had to explain a few days ago why I don’t do the „Add friend” thing. I’m afraid, very afraid, that maybe I’m gonna be disrespectful, or maybe that I am disturbing something important, or maybe that I look to desperate.

Something in the lines of that.

See, now, I don’t hate people. But it’s actually really had to talk and approach someone you know, I find it incredibly difficult to stalk people on social media (another shitty thing I’m no good at).

Friend me maybe?

More Than A Troll…

In this day and age, everything seems more connected than ever. It’s so easy to find old colleagues, old flames or even family members, and it’s easy to track their habits and likes or dislikes using social sites.

This kind of behavior amplifies bullying to such an extent that most people are becoming aware of the future harm they could suffer after posting things online.

I don’t know if I should call those people paranoid or not, but I think they have a pretty good reason to do so.

After I read this article, I started thinking about all the stories of cyber-bullying (contrary to what the author says, I believe that this was bullying and not trolling – or maybe I don’t know the definitions too well), stories that I read only in a week’s time.

I live in a part of the world where bullying doesn’t take place the same as in USA. I used to be bullied, I guess, but only because my mom was divorced and kids used to laugh at me. That went away when I started high school, where everybody seemed to have their flaws.

In our high school, nobody used to get shoved in the trash can, nobody was slushied, nobody was laughed at for being too fat (well, maybe only behind their back, but fat kids still had friends), nobody was planning to destroy the school or take revenge on their peers. So, basically, everybody had at least one friend to lean on.

I don’t know if the young people in Romania are following the same pattern we did (I have finished high school about 8 years ago), but I am pretty sure that we can’t talk about bullying in an American way.

I am terrified at the horrors I read online, all those stories about kids killing their friends and teachers, because they were laughed at for being „unfit”. I am amazed at all the reasons people find to bully others, starting with their skin color, sexuality and body and finishing with their likes in music or films. I find it scary to live there, in the land of the free, where you have to be so „conform” just to barely live through high school. I find it tragic that kids are so cruel and have no will or desire to put themselves in their friends’ shoes and see how bad it feels to be hated for such little things.

I read the story of the girl that killed herself because she was bullied for being too pretty.

I read the story of a girl that killed herself because she was bullied for making a mistake once.

I read the story of a boy that killed himself because he was bullied for being gay.

I read the story of the girl that was nominated for Homecoming Queen as a joke from the popular kids (I am glad she won).

I read the story where a 17 year old bullies a grown man, with words like „I will piss on your wife’s face and you will see it”.

What the hell is wrong in this world? What can we do to teach kids that this is not the way? What moral compass should we force on them so that they stay clear from such dangers?

Everything is obsolete – the Bible doesn’t work, the internet is full of CP, behind of every computer, there may be a grown man waiting for young pray. How can we teach kids to defend themselves and how can we teach kids not to become bullies?

I know that maybe bullying looks like power, at a first glance. I am unsure of how a bully’s mind works, but I know for sure that the bullied person feels like crap whenever that happens. It makes you feel vulnerable, fearful, disappointed, scared, alone, like dying. I just wish we could find a way to end this.

Update: Anonymus is trying to find the man that drove Amanda Todd to kill herself. So there is justice in the world.