Last

Last step you’ve known this year,
and with that, dear,
I promise to hold near
the promises I made and never kept,
because what’s better than intent?

Last time you can commit to things
before you lose them to noncommittal sins,
and if you tell me you’ll work out and diet,
I’ll pretend you are believed
and I’ll be quiet.

Last moment before you dip into the unknown,
new year, new you, new, fresh abandon.
You’d like to think this time around you’ll be better
at keeping your word and following through
with promises at midnight. However…

Clock strikes at midnight,
seconds of excitement and pain
incite fright
and dull the brain.

The Split Love

Of bigger cities
With empty office spaces,
With the split love of hills and music and sunshine,
Unreasonably sad web of lies
When you say goodbye to one
And you’re glad you found the other one.
A trickling feeling
Of broken smiles
Cleaning your desk
Your empty desk in this small town
Is no small ask.
It’s like you care only about yourself
In the big city and in the big village as well.
Nothing is in moderation,
And everything is in consternation
As if you’re still finding and following
Footsteps that were never walked.
Your mouth is easy to speak to, but your ears are so hard to be talked
Too.
Imagine as we cloud the sunsets,
Pull the blanket of dreams on our eyes.
Sweet revelries, sour child.
Keep thinking of you.

Hollow

How tasty are the words
You’re spitting,
Like verses
Unnerved
And my nerves
Are tired,
You breathe
And here I think
I feel you kisses down my neck,
But it’s your tasty, lovely noose,
That’s making me obtuse
A silly goose
That tastes like chocolate moose.
Oh, let me dip into you,
The lovely spruce
Of infinite envy
And infinite hope,
Infinite nothings
And old tired tropes.
I lay at your feet,
Still signalling deep,
Your words are like tasty desires and sins,
I’m mesmerised by your hollowness within.

What if

People in your life
Die
So that you can live.
They die
So that you can find reasons to live,
And until you’ve lived
You cannot pass,
Until you’ve loved
You cannot make the matter mass
Until you’ve found someone to
Latch on to.
You cannot go into the unknown.

What if we only die
When our last love has found
Someone to love,
Someone to care for,
Someone to replace us.

What if we die to save our loves
Until they find a different way to love?

what was before

what was before, he asked wildly
the night was young, and suddenly
i closed my eyes and felt the breeze,
the swing of wind, the gentle tease
of newer breath that’s all over the place.
you give me power, give me space,
give me a wilderness i’ve never faced.
less of an angel in disgrace,
more of a devil to embrace.

Embroiled

So much scarring from morning sun,
blistering cold from trains and cars passing me by.
So many cuts from blades of grass,
so much noise from storms,
but so much comfort from people I’ve known.
So much destruction from the outside world,
and yet so much peace from looking into your eyes.
Safety and quiet from being with you,
happiness and fulfillment from breathing the same air.
Outside is rough, it’s noisy and loud,
outside is grim, tired and soiled.
Inside is tranquil, with nothing in between.

I open my eyes, and here I am, embroiled.