Revisiting Midnights A Year Later

A pop classic by now, Taylor Swift’s Midnights is a sultry experiment that forces you to face your darkest, deeper emotional demons.

When it came out in 2022, I remember I was on a day trip with my favourite person in the whole wide world, visiting one of his friends before he embarked on a journey to the end of the world. I was grateful to be able to listen to Midnights on our way there, and explore the sounds in our really old Honda CR-V.

I remember feeling upset because it didn’t sound like the 70s promised by the promotional pictures, and it seemed more reflective and introspective than I thought. Everything seemed tainted with salty tears and fears of being found out, which is a very odd combination.

Kicking off with Lavender Haze, with its very deep sounds from behind the haze indeed, Taylor seems to imply she’s content with what she wants, and not think of marriage or limiting beliefs. But somehow her voice seems to ache for the validation that comes from solidifying a connection in the most tangible way… there’s a deeper need than being wifed up, she sounds like she’s asking to be acknowledged.

Maroon was my personal favourite for the longest of time, and Swift’s deeper rich tone with the melody anchored in the drums makes this an otherworldly experience. The longing, the reminiscence of someone who got away, the whispered wishes, the intensity of the chorus, the ghost of that someone lingering in between words… I remember listening to it and feeling like I’m regretting someone, even though I’m not missing anyone, and feeling bad, almost ashamed for looking back into someone’s life and feeling their feelings. Taylor’s enunciation makes my blood boil, and I can see the needle spinning on a vinyl.

Anti-Hero is the designated lead single, and while it is a perfect single, it pales in comparison with other songs. It rehashes the old narrative that Swift is the underdog and is a bit tiresome to witness it. While it’s dressed as a way to self deprecate and show self awareness, I think it lacks precisely that, and sadly it doesn’t stand the test of time. Yes, Swift can write a hook like no one else, but this is one of her weakest ones, even though it was meant as an update copy of Blank Space.

Snow On The Beach, in all its iterations, makes me wide eyed and curious for sweet nothings and just happy to be here. I prefer the original, with Lana del Rey harmonising with Swift, and the sounds flow like warm honey, and I want to wear mittens and a fluffy hat in the crisp morning air… just lovely.

The coveted track 5, You’re On Your Own, Kid, it’s another brand of mirrorball and this is me trying. I must say I prefer the other two songs about trying too much and never being enough, trying to mirror others and never getting it right. I think the lament specific to the subject matter is what makes this track 5 a bit more in your face and lacks subtlety.

There’s very few songs of Taylor with her squeaky clean image that could make you think that she’s a sexy vicious mastermind, but Midnight Rain is one of them. Few things are so intense in this world like knowing you want something different, you’re different from everyone, and you just NEED to explore the darkness in you. Midnight Rain achieves ruin perfectly, along with taking accountability and embracing the temptation. If champagne problems evolved into something, it was midnight rain.

Long speculated to be about Harry Styles, Question…? is intense lyrically, but the sound is too repetitive and stale to matter. I do like how Swift says “oh” with resignation and sultry…

I can see the appeal of Vigilante Shit. As an artist long plagued with questions about their own personal brand of feminism, Swifts allegiance with scorned women is more prevalent on later albums, and vigilante shit is the way she achieved it this time. I would say it’s a bit too performative for my liking, but I appreciate the intention and not the execution. It’s always a skip, despite its huge popularity with the fans.

Bejeweled was my first favourite song off the album, back in 2022 when Midnights was released. There was a familiarity to it, and after several listens, I could tell it’s because of a chord progression similar to The Knife’s Heartbeats, which is one of my favourite songs ever. Obviously, it’s not a note for note reproduction, maybe a simple coincidence, but the song is still a earworm, a year later. Something about the timing, the assertiveness of the lyrics, the focus on allowing oneself to shine despite feeling so dull in a relationship just makes it perfect. And like everyone else, I am obsessed with how Taylor Swift says „shimmer”.

Labyrinth is another one of those songs that verges on the edge of being great. The breathy vocals are the best thing about it, but also it’s somehow instantly forgettable, relatable and iconic at the same time. I never liked it or added it to my Spotify playlist, but then when I give it a chance, I am entranced.

Karma, in all it’s iterations, is just a song that I avoid at all costs. Nothing is being gained with the Ice Spice remix, and nothing is actually being said with the standard version either. Another rehash of Swift trying to pose as a peaceful, patient, underdog waiting for other forces to avenge her. After lifelong accusations of being cunning, intentional, ruthless, she might as well lean into that persona, instead of trying to pose as this innocent bystander and witness of everyone else’s downfall. And lyrically, Swift effectively hammers it down with such lack of grace and subtlety, in a way that feels forced and disingenuous.

Sweet Nothing was a shock was I saw it on the track list, since one of her exes has a similarly named song. But Calvin Harris’ version couldn’t be further away from this tiny sounding love song. It almost sounds like a nursery rhyme, pointing out at intimacy, comfort, and lack of judgement. If I could hold a song in the palm of my hand, and cherish it forever, it would be this song. It makes me feel like I’m walking on a side street in Amsterdam, at sunset, and observe a kitchen scene with two people in love. Everything is soft, sweet, and safe. I won’t judge the relationship that inspired the song, I’ll just let myself love it.

I feel like Swift achieved what she wanted to do with Labyrinth in Mastermind. It is its more polished cousin, and a confession of Taylor’s penchant for being analytical and intentional about her conquest, and it’s still missing something. It still doesn’t feel genuine, but maybe the people pleasing element is to blame.

This would be the album closer, but since I prefer the 3am edition of the album, I think it’s worth discussing the other 7 tracks, even briefly. Like most fans, I prefer these 7 tracks, as they’re honest and raw, and a lot more confessional and subtle than the big pop of the standard edition.

The Great War employs Taylor’s preferred method to describe a fight. She seems infatuated with the metaphor of a relationship breakdown being akin to a war, and she does this superbly. This is by far one of my favourite songs off the album.

Bigger Than The Whole Sky sits in a place reserved for False God. I don’t see the metaphors other fans see, and I always skip it. Something about it so fake deep, it feels like I’m listening to Taylor Swift pretend to be someone else.

Paris, on the other hand, is such a fun little gem. I can’t get enough of it, it’s so cheesy and playful, and instantly makes me want to go on a holiday.

High Infidelity is a revelation. Swift is taking accountability for overlapping lovers, and it’s refreshing to see that. Sonically, the song drags you in and holds you hostage, in a way that rewires my brain so intensely…

I never know what to say about Glitch. It has somewhat of a cult following, but then again swifties are all a bit of a cult. The sound is again sultry, but it feels unfinished. Swift does magical things with her voice, the way she enunciates „glitch” is sweaty, hazy, mesmerising.

The masterpiece of the album is undoubtedly Would’ve, Could’ve, Should’ve, and I’m sure no one will argue otherwise. Looking back at a very damaging relationship (with fuckboy central John Mayer), the song doesn’t have the wistfulness or hope of other songs, nor the anger and heartbreak conveyed in other. This song is therapy in action, holding a mirror to a lot of children and teenagers preyed upon by adults, that have now enough understanding and strength to understand what was lost. It’s a song about mourning who you were and who you could’ve been, before growing into that person. The lyrics are scathing and harsh, and well deserved. And the best part of it is that as you go deeper into the song, is sounds like a confessional where all the emotions come overwhelming you, and you have to let it all out, and experience everything you bottled up all at once. The way Swift sings the words, almost like she never has time to finish them, gives me a very intense imagery of a dam bursting and all the emotions pent up are just being released. Lyrically, it’s so hard to top this with anything, but I have no doubt Swift will try to out do herself, she always does.

Dear Reader is the perfect unofficial closer. Such a soft gem, cut from the same cloth as You’re On Your Own, Kid, but perfectly executed. I would’ve preferred this as the track 5, instead of what we got, but I do not make decisions, am I?

This album is intense at times, with contrasting melodies and lyrics, but the choices in what ended up on the standard album make it sound unfinished most of the times. It feels a bit unfair having to dig through CDs and vinyls to get the full picture, to get Hits Different, more Lana Del Rey, and You’re Losing Me, but at the end of the day, Midnights achieves what it sets out to – showing us snapshots of Swift’s sleepless nights, plagues with memories, wishful thinking, rebellion, secrecy, and maturity.

Review: Taylor Swift – evermore

This new Taylor Swift album comes at a time where life is a bit busy now, and it’s Christmas time too, and life is fast and slow at the same time, while enjoying partial lockdowns and tiers throughout Britain. This record is autumnal and wintery at the same time, hopeful, and emotional torturing, and bright, and regretful.

Her new album, evermore, comes as a sister album to her previous effort, and she manages to capture the beauty of both the similarities and differences between the 2 bodies of work. They can be enjoyed and dissected separately or together, but their impact is undeniable.

After enjoying folklore for 5 months, while my initial reaction was a bit… emotionally stunted, to say the least, I’ve come to enjoy it a lot, and my tears ricochet is still my favourite piece on it.

The album starts off with the lead single, willow. A very witchy vibe, but with promises of everlasting love, although not spoken out loud, this song is a very dancey, and the guitar delivers a very comforting, yet mysterious atmosphere. This song is not about pleading, but more like affirmations of love and standing by “her man”. Maybe not my favourite, but definitely not skippable, especially because of the level of confidence it exudes.

Wait for the signal and I’ll meet you after dark
Show me the places where the others gave you scars
Now this is an open-shut case
Guess I should’ve known from the look on your face
Every bait and switch was a work of art

The next song, track number 2, champagne problems, is a very sad delivery of a love story about two people that find themselves wanting different things in life. Echoing things of the past, and things of the present, but with different protagonists, the cadence of the piano makes it feel like every word and note is a dagger that gets shoved in your heart and taken out with the music. Some people have pointed out the possible mental health issues of the female protagonist, however I think we should also celebrate the fact that this song allows one of the parties to remove themselves from a relationship that doesn’t offer them what they want in a way that is honest, albeit a bit blunt.

One for the money, two for the show
I never was ready, so I watch you go
Sometimes you just don’t know the answer
‘Til someone’s on their knees and asks you

And then we have the only Jack Antonoff song off the album, gold rush. It’s such a pop masterpiece, filled with a loud tempo, with an almost electronic sound that effectively increases the expectations and the delivery of a very dreamy soundscape reminiscing of some of the 1989 era songs. It’s a fun song about Swift tying her love to the golden colour, as she does lately when it comes to her lover.

But I don’t like a gold rush, gold rush
I don’t like anticipating my face in a red flush
I don’t like that anyone would die to feel your touch
Everybody wants you
Everybody wonders what it would be like to love you
Walk past, quick brush
I don’t like slow motion double vision in rose blush
I don’t like that falling feels like flying ‘til the bone crush
Everybody wants you
But I don’t like a gold rush

‘tis the damn season is perfect for a December night. It’s about stumbling upon your past, and giving in, and there’s nothing wrong with that. It has a very “the one that got away” vibe, but less positive than the 1, a similarly themed song from folklore. It almost feels like a drunken choice to give in into familiarity, while knowing how wrong it is to do this, and as a fun fact, Swift was drunk when she wrote this song in one night.

We could call it even
You could call me babe for the weekend
‘Tis the damn season, write this down
I’m stayin’ at my parents’ house
And the road not taken looks real good now

My personal favourite, although it’s nothing I’ve experienced, and (supposedly, neither did Swift), it is proof that you don’t necessarily need a personal example to feel inspired. This song is about (allegedly) Princess Diana and Prince Charles, and depicts a very dysfunctional story of someone always trying to please their partner, which only tolerates their presence and efforts. It feels a bit like mirrorball off folklore, but while that song is a bit directed at the whole world, this is directed at the cruelty of our partners. Because I truly believe that it’s so much easier to be cruel to someone we love, and especially cruel with someone who loves us, and this song just further confirms this for me. The piano in tolerate it is haunting, the lyrics are just sharp knives hitting me, and Taylor’s vocals are pained with unrequited love…

While you were out building other worlds, where was I?
Where’s that man who’d throw blankets over my barbed wire?
I made you my temple, my mural, my sky
Now I’m begging for footnotes in the story of your life
Drawing hearts in the byline
Always taking up too much space or time
You assume I’m fine, but what would you do if

I break free and leave us in ruins?
Took this dagger in me and removed it?
Gain the weight of you then lose it
Believe me, I could do it

Taylor Swift’s collaboration with her friends from HAIM is quite the fun true crime little story, but I have to admit – while I do enjoy the fun element, I still think it’s a bit too simple for Swift’s ambitions and potential. But I like this route and I support it happen again in the future. The song feels much like a typical country song, where a woman is avenged by her friends. This simplistic approach works well in telling this story, and no body, no crime presents itself as being a little unconventional and worthy to be explored by Netflix maybe.

Good thing my daddy made me get a boating license when I was fifteen
And I’ve cleaned enough houses to know how to cover up a scene
Good thing Este’s sister’s gonna swear she was with me („She was with me dude”)
Good thing his mistress took out a big life insurance policy

Track 7, happiness, is a weird song. Sounds like it belongs in a funeral, but it’s about love. And I think here Swift explores again the delicate nature of love and breakups. And as much as I love loud love, this song gives me “fingertips touching your skin, promises on the beach, warm bowl of soup when you have a cold” vibes, and I am here for this.

There’ll be happiness after me
But there was happiness because of me
Both of these things I believe
There is happiness
In our history
Across our great divide
There is a glorious sunrise
Dappled with the flickers of light
From the dress I wore at midnight
Leave it all behind
And there is happiness

Next track is dorothea, a very folkish sounding song, I feel the 70s in this song, and it’s so much fun because of this. The piano and the guitars blend so well, and if you ask me, I don’t know what the song is about, while I know all the lyrics.

The National team up (finally!) with Swift on track 9, to sing about Coney Island. Even for someone like me, who hasn’t visited New York, this landmark is a staple in all dramatic scenes in all the romantic movies. The story is so cruel and sweet at the same time, reminiscing about this partner that was a perfect match, but who the protagonist chased away because of their own demons. Taylor’s sweet vocals with Berninger’s low tone make this song feel like forgiveness and frustration at the same time, and I don’t think there’s a better way to feel when you hear this song.

The question pounds my head
„What’s a lifetime of achievement?”
If I pushed you to the edge
But you were too polite to leave me
And do you miss the rogue
Who coaxed you into paradise and left you there?
Will you forgive my soul
When you’re too wise to trust me and too old to care?
‘Cause we were like the mall before the Internet
It was the one place to be
The mischief, the gift wrapped suburban dreams
Sorry for not winning you an arcade ring

Another love song, ivy, is a beautiful metaphor about the pains caused by a lover, and how the marks people leave on us are visible or not, but we can still feel them. The lyrics are pure poetry, and the song is so simple, yet so encompassing of how it feels to be in love!

And the old widow goes to the stone every day
But I don’t, I just sit here and wait
Grieving for the living

Oh, goddamn
My pain fits in the palm of your freezing hand
Taking mine, but it’s been promised to another
Oh, I can’t
Stop you putting roots in my dreamland
My house of stone, your ivy grows
And now I’m covered in you

Another very country sounding track, cowboy like me, smells like whiskey and cigarettes, but also like home. The theme is so simple, being about finding a like minded individual that can offer you hope and new life. This love seems wild, but feels like home, and the paradox of it all blends with the melody perfectly.

And the skeletons in both our closets
Plotted hard to mess this up
And the old men that I’ve swindled
Really did believe I was the one
And the ladies lunching have their stories about
When you passed through town
But that was all before I locked it down

A change of pace comes with long story short, and Swift is back at her usual pop sound. Feels like a very open shut case, and there’s nothing wrong with that. The fun, upbeat tempo delivered with the lyrics that depict a very bad time, makes it seem like less impactful than it clearly was.

Past me
I wanna tell you not to get lost in these petty things
Your nemeses
Will defeat themselves before you get the chance to swing
And he’s passing by
Rare as the glimmer of a comet in the sky
And he feels like home
If the shoe fits, walk in it everywhere you go

Swift’s tribute to her grandmother, marjorie, is a very sweet song filled with advice from another life, and memories that bring up nostalgia. I love this song so much, mainly because it reminds me of my own grandmother.

The autumn chill that wakes me up
You loved the amber skies so much
Long limbs and frozen swims
You’d always go past where our feet could touch
And I complained the whole way there
The car ride back and up the stairs
I should’ve asked you questions
I should’ve asked you how to be
Asked you to write it down for me
Should’ve kept every grocery store receipt
‘Cause every scrap of you would be taken from me
Watched as you signed your name Marjorie
All your closets of backlogged dreams
And how you left them all to me

Something unexpected hits right after marjorie, and that’s closure. I absolutely love this song, for everything that it stands for. It’s a very repetitive beat for Swift, looking like she wants to distance from a former lover that wants to offer closure and asks for forgiveness and understanding. It’s about gaining the power of not waiting for others to offer you closure, and accepting the anger and the spite that come with a breakup. There is power in being bitter, afterall.

Don’t treat me like some situation that needs to be handled
I’m fine with my spite
And my tears
And my beers and my candles
I can feel you smoothing me over

Yes, I got your letter
Yes, I’m doing better
It cut deep to know ya
Right to the bone
Yes, I got your letter
Yes, I’m doing better
I know that it’s over
I don’t need your closure

The closing track of evermore is evermore, another collaboration with Bon Iver. As always, Swift’s and Vernon’s voices blend together to create magic. This will forever be a winter song, regardless of when I will be listening to it. Less dramatic and heartbreaking that their previous collab, exile, evermore is here to heal unspoken wounds, to offer relief and hope and growth. Bon Iver’s part is the most Bon Iver part of the song, and it makes evermore more indie than anything else on this album, while Swift’s vocals kind of remind me of Safe & Sound.

Hey December
Guess I’m feeling unmoored
Can’t remember
What I used to fight for

I rewind the tape but all it does is pause
On the very moment all was lost
Sending signals
To be double crossed

The whole album is full of unskippable gems, and it honestly solidifies Taylor Swift’s dominance of the charts and the music industry. With collaborators like The National and Bon Iver, with people like Paul McCartney supporting her, with her amazing songwriting skills, I think it’s safe to leave the “Taylor Swift is a bitch” narrative in the past. She can be enjoyed beyond her country albums, beyond her pop albums, beyond her over produced ones, and she is magnificent.

Review: Taylor Swift – folklore

Life’s too short to pretend Taylor Swift is (still!) a guilty pleasure for some people. Ever since I met her (metaphorically speaking, of course), probably 12 years ago, I used to think she’s just a harmless pop princess, the one that won’t go awry with bad habits, drugs and alcohol.

Little did I know, she would embark on a journey in the spotlight to try and defend herself in very gruelling situations, some of which no one could ever think of before the internet. Heavily scrutinized because of her dating life and her (supposed) inspiration from her relationships, I think she was always assumed to be the whiney, mean girl, always playing the victim and yelling “wolf” when things didn’t go her way.

I also realised she’s a crafty wordsmith, with interesting ideas in terms of artistic expression, so she moved from ‘unphased pleasure’ to ‘fun pleasure’, ‘quirky moments’, and, in later years, ‘pop icon’ status.

On 24th July 2020, Miss Taylor Alison Swift has released her 8th album, and oh boy… where do I start?!

Nothing like her previous albums, but effectively smelling, tasting and feeling exactly like Swift’s poetry, which in itself is a phenomenon in her field, folklore manages to gather around her lyrics the faint feeling of love you’re feeling in the pouring rain, when you’re walking barefoot in the forest, when you’re dreaming under the stars, and when you’re remembering things from centuries ago, without the added weight of anxiety and shame. Shameful to say, but I wouldn’t know what to do if I had Swift’s ability to write poetry in such a natural way.

Because we’re talking about Taylor Swift, the track list is an Easter Egg on its own. Starting with the 1, the album sets the tone for this new Swiftian era. the 1 is that story you wish you’d share with an ex love that you always thought it would be the one who got away. Starting from a more mature point, past her usual pettiness, Swift masterful word crafting gets her towards imagines of the ‘roaring 20s’ and penny tossing, reminiscing about someone who could’ve been fun for her. Given her current situation, I’d say this is just a revisit with nostalgia glasses, pondering what could’ve been if only one thing would be different. The song itself is a different beast from Taylor Swift’s catalogue, having some electronic accents, on top of a trickling piano and with minimal percussion. The whole song feels like summer afternoon in a small town, somewhere in the mountains, and I am so happy in a very calm way about it.

But we were something, don’t you think so?
Roaring twenties, tossing pennies in the pool
And if my wishes came true
It would’ve been you
In my defense, I have none
For never leaving well enough alone
But it would’ve been fun
If you would’ve been the one

Next song, cardigan, sees Swift putting on her folk/soft rock jacket on. This piano ballad is again filled with literary references, because Taylor Swift likes to poke fun at herself, and her army of dedicated fans. The song talks about young, innocent love, plagued by battle scars, lack of confidence and bitterness. cardigan is the lead single, and it does a good job in setting the expectations high for this new work of art. It’s also worth noting that this is part of the ‘young love trio’, along with august and betty.

And when I felt like I was an old cardigan under someone’s bed
You put me on and said I was your favourite
A friend to all is a friend to none
Chase two girls, lose the one
When you are young, they assume you know nothing

the last great american dynasty lets Swift borrow from urban legends on a pop track. Here we see Swift telling the story Rebekah Harkness, the woman previously owned Taylor Swift’s home in Rhode Island. Because this album is supposed to be a collection of stories, more or less based on reality, we witness Swift’s talent in full glory – building stories from nothing, and romanticizing them and making them work to her favour. Although not a favourite song of mine, the song has a certain appeal, especially because of the brazenness of the lyrics.

There goes the most shameless woman this town has ever seen
She had a marvellous time ruining everything

Bon Iver is a guest on the fourth track, exile, and I think there are very few people who can actually deny the greatness of this music dialogue. Adding Justin Vernon’s deep baritone next to Swift’s breathy vocals proves to be a very successful mix, and drawing comparisons to The Last Time, from Taylor Swift’s Red album. The song is imagined as a dialogue between two exes, but no one seems to be listening. Over the piano and the dramatic strings, the vocals manage to create to such a build-up, taking the song to a different plane.

All this time
I never learned to read your mind (Never learned to read my mind)
I couldn’t turn things around (You never turned things around)
‘Cause you never gave a warning sign (I gave so many signs)
So many signs
So many signs (You didn’t even see the signs)

As fan favourites go, the 5th track of a Taylor Swift album is usually the best song off the album. My personal favourite, my tears ricochet, is a hauntingly beautiful song mourning a past relationship. The POV of the story is that of a deceased lover, reflecting on the toxicity and tension. The funeral imagery of the lyrics, on top of the instrumentals, give the song the gravitas to carry the message home. And if it’s to be believed, this is a message to be delivered to Swift’s former record label. And even if it’s not, I can guess we can all rely on the lyrics in various situations.

We gather stones
Never knowing what they’ll mean
Some to throw
Some to make a diamond ring
You know I didn’t want to
Have to haunt you
But what a ghostly scene
You wear the same jewels
That I gave you
As you bury me

I didn’t have it in myself to go with grace
And so the battleships will sink beneath the waves
You had to kill me, but it killed you just the same
Cursing my name
Wishing I stayed
You turned into your worst fears
And you’re tossing out blame
Drunk on this pain
Crossing out the good years
And you’re cursing my name
Wishing I stayed
Look at how my tears ricochet

mirrorball talks about being a reflection of others, rather than being yourself, and damn, isn’t that sometimes the truth. This confession is scary and dangerous, as Swift’s music was oftentimes scrutinized by the media due to the personal nature of her lyrics, when all she wanted was to be relatable and to be able to give her fans honesty and a deep connection.

I want you to know
I’m a mirrorball
I’ll show you every version of yourself tonight
I’ll get you out on the floor
Shimmering beautiful
And when I break it’s in a million pieces

Reminiscing about a childhood friend, seven is the – you guessed it, 7th track. Packed with queer hints, the story unfolds about two friends who enjoyed their time together, but with one of them living in a possible abusive home, the dark tones of the song cannot be missed. Still revelling in the innocence of kids at 7 years old, when you’d dream you can go anywhere, seven captures that freedom of being who you are when you’re still young and not yet moulded into a useful member of the society.

And I’ve been meaning to tell you
I think your house is haunted
Your dad is always mad and that must be why
And I think you should come live with
Me and we can be pirates
Then you won’t have to cry
Or hide in the closet
And just like a folk song
Our love will be passed on

The eighth song had to have Swift poking fun again, because the track is called august. Tasting like summer, this pop rock ballad evokes young love again, with a hint of sadness. Singing about love you can never attain, and yet being so intertwined with feelings of belonging to someone who doesn’t belong to you. It’s Swift poetry, and Swift guitar, and Swift anguish, and it should be trademarked. Also, it’s part of the ‘young love trio’, with cardigan and betty.

‘Cause you were never mine
Never mine
Do you remember?
Remember when I pulled up
And said „Get in the car”
And then cancelled my plans
Just in case you’d call
Back when I was living for the hope of it all
For the hope of it all
„Meet me behind the mall”

this is me trying reveals even darker moments, talking about feeling alone when it becomes too difficult to cope with the insane standards you put for yourself, struggling with mental illness, alcoholism. Probably the most insane lyrics belong to this song – I was so ahead of the curve, the curve became a sphere.

They told me all of my cages were mental
So I got wasted like all my potential
And my words shoot to kill when I’m mad
I have a lot of regrets about that
I was so ahead of the curve, the curve became a sphere
Fell behind all my classmates and I ended up here
Pourin’ out my heart to a stranger
But I didn’t pour the whiskey

illicit affairs is another favourite of mine, its subject so simple, yet such a compelling study material. Finally we see Swift becoming more mature, more understanding to the prospect of a trio, not pointing blame on the third person anymore, but rather trying to be understanding and empathetic.

And that’s the thing about illicit affairs
And clandestine meetings
And stolen stares
They show their truth one single time
But they lie and they lie and they lie
…a million little times

In a very innocent switch to the more romantic side of things, invisible string is a verbal painting of Swift’s current relationship, and includes references to past life, songs and places. Built on an acoustic guitar, the song is a very childlike, candid glimpse of Swift’s current universe.

Time
Mystical time
Cutting me open, then healing me fine
Were there clues I didn’t see?
And isn’t it just so pretty to think
All along there was some
Invisible string
Tying you to me?

Sarcastic Taylor is at it again, with mad woman. Bringing back the torches and lighting them and going against the ones who come after her, Swift brings fire over the piano keys in the gentlest way possible. Aimed at her old record label, this song is her fight song against the people she feels wronged by.

Now I breathe flames each time I talk
My cannons all firing at your yacht
They say „move on”
But you know I won’t
And women like hunting witches, too
Doing your dirtiest work for you
It’s obvious that wanting me dead has really brought you two together

And because Taylor Swift isn’t here to sing only about old boyfriends, current boyfriends and her old label, epiphany exists. Paralleling World War II atrocities with the COVID-19 pandemic, her lyrics speak about the trauma of trying to fight on the front, be it invisible or not. Trying to explain how difficult it is to continue serving after fighting death day after day, epiphany sounds more like a hymn than anything.

Crawling up the beaches now

Sir, I think he’s bleedin’ out

And some things you just can’t speak about

Coming back to young love, betty is folksy track based on a harmonica, with a pretty upbeat rhythm, but continuing the cardigan-august story. Probably the least creative of the three, or maybe because of that, betty sounds like a song that Bruce Springsteen himself could sing, and I’m not sure that’s too bad.

You heard the rumours from Inez
You can’t believe a word she says
Most times, but this time it was true
The worst thing that I ever did
Was what I did to you

An ode to her current love, peace sees Swift confessing her vulnerability in front of her loved one, and her fear that sometimes her love is not enough. Despite her being such a high-profile celebrity, Swift manages to keep her love under wraps, and as normal as possible, but also worries about not being able to give her boyfriend the normality they both crave.

But I’m a fire and I’ll keep your brittle heart warm
If your cascade ocean wave blues come
All these people think love’s for show
But I would die for you in secret
The devil’s in the details
But you got a friend in me
Would it be enough
If I could never give you peace?

Easily forgotten, hoax tells the story of a toxic relationship, where the resolution is to keep whatever unhappiness you have rather than start anew. Not necessarily my preferred method, but hey. When I’ll write better music, I’ll let you know.

My only one
My kingdom come undone
My broken drum
You have beaten my heart

Don’t want no other shade of blue
But you
No other sadness in the world would do

Hackney

Words have a different meaning now,

Since I changed latitudes and longitudes.

Things I used to read a different way,

Now they all sound like home,

And they taste like happy to me.

It was long before I got here, and maybe it took me some time,

But now I’m here.

And here we are, both in the same space, time and universe,

Enjoying the words that connect all that we were,

We are

And we will be.

It’s like saints and sinners in the same purgatory,

Except that this purgatory is filled with happiness and smiles,

And we’re all so grateful to be here together.

We all have hope in us, for us,

For the whole wide world that’s been so treacherous.

And at the end of the day, we’re in all this together,

And we’re on the same page of the same story,

On the same side of the history.

I’m part of you, you’re part of me.

There’s no place where I want to be.

Review: Twenty One Pilots – Trench

I’ve discovered Twenty One Pilots more than 3 years ago, but somehow I’ve associated them with similar indie pop rock acts like The 1975, but with a hint of SoundCloud edgy rap that seems to be so popular nowadays.

But even as I started discovering he depth of their lyrics and the meaning behind them, all the stories about love and lost, despair, depression, anxiety, struggles with mental health – everything seemed either a really well curated image or a very sincere outlook into someone’s life.

The duo consists of the sometimes lyrical genius that is Tyler Joseph and drummer Josh Dun, but make no mistake – however small, the group manages to paint realistic pictures of how much of our lives is struggling to get past today.

Trench, their latest album, released in October 2018, explores mental health, suicide and doubt, continuing with similar themes the band touched before with their previous releases. The band benefits from a solid fan base and a relationship with them that is both extraordinary and scary, as they communicate with them the meanings of songs, the process of writing all of this, fictional themes and characters and even cities built around their work, and fans not only engage in this, but they perpetuate this knowledge, without the usual elite-ness that comes from having inside information on something that no one else knows.

Trench debuts with Jumpsuit, which was also the lead single of the new album. Signifying his fight with doubt and societal pressure, Joseph’s lyrics are pretty self explanatory, showing vulnerability and fright and insecurities, and I think that this is what Twenty One Pilots does best – showing their true self to anyone that bothers listening, and comforting them and letting them know that it’s ok to be scared and alone.
Musically, Jumpsuit is actually a hard rock composition, with heavy bass lines and with Joseph’s voice going from soft whispers to heavy screams and his signature falsetto.

Levitate, although a bit too minimalist and seemingly simplistic in composition, picks up from Jumpsuit left off, referencing another fan favorite, Car Radio. Joseph’s rapping combined with Dun’s drumming makes this song seem primal, but at the same time, it bears the signature of both of them.

Morph, which can only be described as a philosopher’s train of thoughts about life, death and afterlife, is scarily depressing, as it echoes thoughts that most of us had at some point or another. Tyler Joseph is known for his sincerity in his approach to mental health and how much he cares for the well being of their fan base, so I’m guessing that most of them will recognize themselves in the bleak lyrics.

I’m surrounded and I’m hounded
There’s no „above”, or „under”, or „around” it
For „above” is blind belief and „under” is sword to sleeve
And „around” is scientific miracle, let’s pick „above” and see
For if and when we go „above”, the question still remains
Are we still in love and is it possible we feel the same?
And that’s when going „under” starts to take my wonder
But until that time
I’ll morph to someone else, I’m just a ghost

My personal favorite, My Blood, is about being loyal, loving and supporting someone that goes through the darkest of times. It helps that the video also makes a connection with mental health issues, supporting the theory that the band is really open in breaking down barriers and stereotypes.

If there comes a day
People posted up at the end of your driveway
They’re callin’ for your head and they’re callin’ for your name
I’ll bomb down on ‘em, I’m comin’ through
Do they know I was grown with you?
If they’re here to smoke, know I’ll go with you
Just keep it outside, keep it outside, yeah

Chlorine was one of the songs I thought I was actively avoiding, only to find out that I was actually loving and knowing by heart. Taken literally, the chemical compound is known for its primary use as an agent in bleaches and disinfectants, and the metaphor of the song is to have an anchor in your life that helps you purge away all the dark thoughts.

Sippin’ on straight chlorine, let the vibes slide over me
This beat is a chemical, beat is a chemical
When I leave don’t save my seat, I’ll be back when it’s all complete
The moment is medical, moment is medical
Sippin’ on straight chlorine

And because an ode to love was needed, Smithereens has its place on this record about feelings and thoughts. Dedicated to Tyler Joseph’s wife, the song is translating into plain words whatever is happening in Joseph’s heart, and it’s sweet and cheesy and amazing all at once.

Dealing with suicide and the glorification treatment in the media, Neon Gravestones is a slow burning rap song that feels blaming, but justifying it at the same time. With a very conflicting message, you can feel the indecision in Tyler Joseph’s rap, and if one verse you agree to something, the next one will find you agreeing with something completely different.
And that’s the beauty of Twenty One Pilots – everything is ok, you don’t get judged, you don’t get stigmatized. It’s like all they ask of you is to get better…

Don’t get me wrong
The rise in awareness
Is beating a stigma that no longer scares us
But for sake of discussion
In spirit of fairness
Could we give this some room for a new point of view?
And, could it be true that some could be tempted
To use this mistake as a form of aggression?
A form of succession?
A form of a weapon?
Thinking „I’ll teach them”
Well, I’m refusing the lesson
It won’t resonate in our minds
I’m not disrespecting what was left behind
Just pleading that „it” does not get glorified
Maybe we swap out what it is that we hold so high
Find your grandparents or someone of age
Pay some respects for the path that they paved
To life, they were dedicated
Now, that should be celebrated

The Hype is such simple music, it’s really hard to explain it. Being so straightforward, about the different way we experience our internal standards versus whatever the others are expecting from us, it’s a reminder to slow down and stop being so hard on ourselves.

Following the universe built by Joseph, Nico and the Niners, based in part on the Nicolas Bourbaki legend, which was actually a group of 9 mathematicians, and continuing old themes explored by the group, such as the jumpsuit, Dema and the bishops, is a rap song about resisting organized religion and finding your own way.

What I say when I want to be enough
What a beautiful day for making a break for it
We’ll find a way to pay for it
Maybe from all the money we made razor-blade stores
Rent a race horse and force a sponsor
And start a concert, a complete diversion
Start a mob and you can be quite certain
We’ll win but not everyone will get out

Probably the most optimistic song, lyrically wise, Cut My Lip talks about going through hard times, even if you feel beaten down. A simple, slow burner as well, but really uplifting.

Bandito is a ethereal song that connects to the themes of the album – leaving Dema, accepting your fate, trying to become someone else, trying to find purpose in creativity and human connection.

I created this world
To feel some control
Destroy it if I want
So I sing someone
Folina
Sahlo Folina
Sahlo

For me, the most forgettable song is Pet Cheetah. Apparently about overcoming writer’s block, the song is a weird mixture of rap, techno and rock, a bit of forcibly pretentious without much substance. Much like writer’s block, I presume.

Legend is another love song, albeit this time is for Joseph’s grandfather, who passed away this year. Forever connecting this song to my own personal troubled times, it’s an uplifting way to cope with such loss.

Then the day that it happened
I recorded this last bit
I look forward to having
A lunch with you again

My other personal favorite, Leave the City, talks about suicide and maybe leaving behind things that you have no control over, or things that you don’t feel connected to anymore. It talks about lost battles, about lost human connections, lost faith, lost minds. It’s such a simple song, but so heavy on my heart…

In time, I will leave the city
For now, I will stay alive

Last year
I needed change of pace
Couldn’t take the pace of change
Moving hastily
But this year
Though I’m far from home
In TRENCH I’m not alone
These faces facing me

Review: An Evening With Jason Mraz and His Guitar

A few years back I have discovered one of the greatest musical gifts I have ever received, because most of the artists I hold dear are the ones I discovered through an extensive period of trials and errors, and I must admit that Jason Mraz is one of them. I remember an internet cafe in my hometown, circa 2005, browsing Yahoo Music (remember that?) and stumbling upon Mraz’s Wordplay. I was so amazed by his flow, his witty lyrics and genuine feel good vibe, I became an instant fan.

After a few years, I moved to Bucharest and I had so many lows, with only his guitar and lyrics, as well as some Angels and Airwaves and Snow Patrol and Marilyn Manson to keep me warm.

16508123_419215758419420_8243905664880510741_n

Last night I had one of the best nights of my life, no doubt about it. Jason Mraz finally graced us with his presence, an event titled „An evening with Jason Mraz and his guitar”, and (I might add) his keyboard and harmonica. Two beautiful hours of love, music and incredibile words, this is the only way I can describe Mraz’s live presence.

Jason Mraz’s good natured spirit transcends the language barrier, his voice carried us last night to the moon and back, it gave us dreams and reasons to live, it gave us love and sadness and grief and hope, and I will forever be greatful for this opportunity to see one of my favorite artists bear his soul in front of me.

Just a small snippet (from a different concert, I can’t be bothered to record live acts and miss the good stuff):

I was happy hearing Plane and A Beautiful Mess and Butterfly and Please (Don’t Tell Her) and Mr. Curiosity and Tonight not Again, and many more! I’m sorry he missed Wordplay and Geek in the Pink, but I’ll take what I can get:

And through timeless words in priceless pictures
We’ll fly like birds not of this earth
And tides they turn and hearts disfigure
But that’s no concern when we’re wounded together
And we tore our dresses and stained our shirts
But it’s nice today, oh the wait was so worth it

PS: I will not post a setlist for this concert, just because for this kind of event Jason Mraz does not follow a pre-established list of songs. He just goes where the vibe takes him. And also because this is more heartfelt than anything I saw in a long, long, looooong time…

Let’s Talk About Ramsay Bolton

who let the dogs outA few years back I sang an ode to the most incredible pop culture current ever – the appreciation of the villain. I sang praises to Loki, and Bane, and The Joker itself, underlining the exceptional quality of being entirely charismatic in a world of destruction.

This week’s Game of Thrones gave us one of the best episodes (if not the best, as some say) and a battle to enjoy. What’s left of this battle is the collective information that Ramsay Bolton is now dog food, but boy, does he deliver!

Suffice to say that casting Iwan Rheon was the thing that made me watch Game of Thrones regularily. After enjoying his presence in Misfits, a quirky show with plenty of to be-stars and very real in portraing teenage angst, the news that he’s gonna play a new character in the ultimate high fantasy HBO production was very intriguing. After some digging, because I haven’t finished reading the books, I learned that his character was at least evil, and thus, interesting.

I’m a sucker for Rheon, whom I consider one of the greatest actors of his generation, because he’s got that Sunday school boy face and the eyes of a madman – kinda like our little hobbit, Elijah Wood. This combination always catches my eye and interest, so I started binging and enjoying Ramsey.

This is not to say that I agree with his way of living. No way! I’m all for the good guys. But Ramsay has that viciousness that lures you in, and you only realize that when it’s too late. His character is demanding your full attention, his gore will make you sick and his capable mind will only make you envious of its power.

Iwan Rheon was the unnamed leader of prime time television evil for his entire run on Game of Thrones. His Ramsay was the ultimate villain, mastering the fear and plotting torture with a smile on his beautiful, angelic face. A part of me is sad that this amazing work of art will not be present next week on my little screen. A part of me is happy with the way his life and death we’re handled – not some greater than life transformation from bad to good, but a former’s victim revenge. A part of me is in awe that I could ever like such a person. And another part of me refuses to watch Game of Thrones again.

He was the greatest villain of our time, and nothing can fill the void he left.

Pic.