Adam Levine, People’s Sexiest Man Alive

Everyone’s problem these days seems to be the Sexiest Man Alive chosen by People magazine. It seems that Adam Levine, massive d-bag with sexy abs, is not worthy of the title because of… Well, his douche-bagginess.

Apparently, his abs (and tats, for those into that kind of stuff) are not enough for the title of the Sexiest Man Alive. Oh well, when magazines like People, GQ or FHM start ranking people based on their behavior and their douche-bagginess (or lack of that), then I’ll argue that the person chosen to represent a generation of sexy is not worth that title.

In the meantime, we are left sighing at the abs of Hugh Jackman and Ryan Gossling and we are left dreaming of the ample bust of Scarlett Johansson and the sexy beach body of JT’s wife (can’t seem to remember her name, though).

People do not rank sexy people based on their humane qualities. People do not choose the sexiest person alive based on the money they donate or the amount of children with cancer they help. People do not take into account the fact that some of these celebrities are cheaters and frauds, so why do you have to be sooooooo judgmental?

Adam Levine and his abs were asking for this title for so long, it’s only right to give them what’s already theirs.