Ruin

You know when all your mistakes

Taste like the best choices?

They taste like coffee in the morning,

And some high spirit in the evening,

And they make you shiver,

And sweat,

And reconsider

All of your thoughts,

And wishes, and wants.

And you’ll lose all the plots

Just to have the chance

To choose again

The poorly poured wine

In the pursed lips

Of someone you loathe

As much as you loathe yourself.

Hackney

Words have a different meaning now,

Since I changed latitudes and longitudes.

Things I used to read a different way,

Now they all sound like home,

And they taste like happy to me.

It was long before I got here, and maybe it took me some time,

But now I’m here.

And here we are, both in the same space, time and universe,

Enjoying the words that connect all that we were,

We are

And we will be.

It’s like saints and sinners in the same purgatory,

Except that this purgatory is filled with happiness and smiles,

And we’re all so grateful to be here together.

We all have hope in us, for us,

For the whole wide world that’s been so treacherous.

And at the end of the day, we’re in all this together,

And we’re on the same page of the same story,

On the same side of the history.

I’m part of you, you’re part of me.

There’s no place where I want to be.

Selfish

Selfish is easy, easier than you might even think,

Smoking and drinking, aimlessly, carelessly,

And it always makes you think you’re on a brink

Of losing your head, your normalcy.

Repeat of repeats, binge living and watching,

Like being stuck on a carousel of feelings,

Where people keep on taking in the brainwashing.

We’re all just poor, trashy, weaklings.

Swings

There’s nothing more you love than dreaming wide awake,

It’s like a whole galaxy hides in your eyes,

And whenever you blink a new one gets born.

The fire in you is warm and peaceful,

Like your arms are home, and your heart is not deceitful,

And you taste like coffee in the evening,

And smell like love in the morning,

And isn’t that exquisite?

As if you’ve planted your courage in me and gave me wings,

And now everything tastes like summer and feels like swings.

Michael

For all the times when my body wasn’t mine,
Please remember
I was just a vessel,
A pathway to something better.
I had room to grow,
I was still this cookie dough
That legends talk about.
All I could do was
Resist and pout.
Now I’m not better,
And I’m not worse either.
I’m the same vessel,
With a little more stuff in me.
I still have room to grow,
And will probably do so
Until there’s no more room left.
Then this vessel won’t be as deft,
And things will spill,
And that’ll no longer be a skill.
Spillage becomes louder,
Spillage becomes death.
Spillage becomes chowder,
That’s when I’ll lose my breath.

Time

And I always thought life was hard,

Demanding,

Tiring,

Upsetting even.

Some mornings were definitely difficult,

And some nights were sleepless,

My body was not my own,

My thoughts were not the best,

And yet I’ve powered through.

We’ve powered through it all.

We thought there’s going to be more time

To reach to where we want to be,

To go to all the places we want to see,

To feel all of the love we want to feel.

The truth is simple, hard, demanding,

Tiring, even upsetting.

The only time we have left is now.

We can’t go back and change the past,

We can’t go forward and fix what we don’t know.

And day by day, and night by night,

We draw in breath; we draw in life.

There is no dark, there’s only light,

The death is silent, no more strife.